By Andrea Chong
Cowtain’s Log: 11 August 2020, Cow’s Make More Milk When Named
It was the crack of dawn.
The stranger was just a whisker away.
“I don’t like cats”, quoted me.
“She” was so friendly, what a darling, what a sweetie, what a cootiepie. This cat was a gamechanger.
“She” rubbed herself against us and claimed us as “hers”.
I claimed “her” as the Raffles cat and started calling “her” William Farquhar, for she was, Raffles’ Cat.
Cowtain’s Log: 15 August 2020, Wipe That sCowl Off Your Face
My neighbour, sheepturds, was coming back from work.
She met “William” on the bridge too.
Being so photogenic, they had a photoshoot.
Cowtain’s Log: 25 August 2020, Catnap
I found a tiny white thing on the bridge.
Worried that it could be a deceased “William”, I ran over.
It was not a deceased “William”.
“She” snoozed.
After going through the respect and consent workshop, I left “her” alone on the bridge.
This little cootiepie made my day.
On the walls of the bridge, there were notices from NUS Cat Café warning us not to feed “her”, I had to snap a shot of that informative notice.
Realizing that my bae was registered with NUS Cat Café, I went onto Instagram… It turns out, “William” wasn’t William ;-; it was COW.
It turns out, Cow wasn’t a “she”, it was a HE.
It turns out, I’ve been played.
Cowtain’s Log: 3 September 2020, RH VaCowtion
Cow decided that it was time for him to explore Raffles Hall. He helped himself into one of the rooms in Kuok and ventured onwards to Block 5. Sheepturds and I were very excited upon his arrival. We flew downstairs and spent 2hours playing with Cow.
Not forgetting, another mandatory photoshoot.
This was the start of his permanent residency.
Cowtain’s Log: 6 September 2020, The Cowwect Choice
NUS Cat Café wants Cow back at the bridge. We are sad.
Cow is a PR at RH. Will he choose RH or UTown for his citizenship?
Cowtain’s Log: 6 September 2020, Crying Over Spilt Milk
Bedtime? Sheeps shoe rack
Playtime? Black curtains
Piss Time? In my room
Hotel? Trivago
Cowtain’s Log: 8 September 2020, Cowch Potato
Cow looking cute sleeping on sheepturds shoe rack uwu
Cowtain’s Log: 12 September 2020, Cowrageous
Cow had never seen a cucumber and found it very cumbersome. He attacked the cumbersome cucumber.
Cowtain’s Log: 26 September 2020, Cowtivating Friendships
Someone brought Cow a new home.
It was a gigantic Milk Box!
Oh, the irony. I’m so funny.
Spent some quality time with Cow.
Midterms are hard.
Cow has more friends than me.
Cowtain’s Log: 28 September 2020, MoRHe Cowch Potato
Nothing much, just more sleeping Cow for midterms uwu
Cowtain’s Log: 29 September 2020, Cowaii
Cow felt dirty and didn’t want to lay on his bed.
Cowtain’s Log: 30 September 2020, As Fat As A Cow
The Blk 5 Aunty has been feeding Cow.
Cow now waits at the Blk 5 Hardcourt at 7am every day for breakfast.
This is like me waiting for 7am to take Comm Hall Breakfast.
Except, I pay for my food.
Cowtain’s Log: 30 September 2020, Cowriosity Killed the Cat
Cow attacked a bird.
Bad cow.
Such… Cowardice….
Easter Eggs
THE ANGRY COWRNER
COWKROACH
LONG CAT
SHOOT YOU COWARD
DISCLOWMERS
Cow does not have a zone attached to him. He will not get demerit points for crossing zones.
Cow’s citizenship is still unknown.
We believe in RHespect & Cowsent.
Cow has an angry corner at Blk3A.
Cow is from the FaCowlty of Arts & Social Sciences, Majoring in PsyCowlogy.
Cow Cowgratulates you for reading this nonsense article.